Tonight I’ll be liveblogging the only debate between Indiana Governor Mike Pence (R) and Senator Tim Kaine (D-Va), the two major party vice-presidential candidates. I expect we’ll hear a lot of Mr. Pence trying to walk back the latest insane ravings of Donald Trump.
The fun and excitement starts on this page at 8:00 Central, 9:00 Eastern and other times back West (does being on Mountain time require you to be at a high elevation?).
Let’s see who wins! Plus we will find out if I can keep my laptop balanced on my coffee table without my wife or dogs knocking it over, or me spilling a beer into the keyboard.
All times are Central time (p.m., because debates don’t occur in the morning).
9:35 — and it is OVER. And no minds were changed. But Tim Kaine is smarter and more capable than I already thought he was. That’s good news. Now I can go smoke and get another beer. Good night!!!!
9:34 — It is clear to me that Pence may have prepared for about five more minutes than Trump did.
9:32 — Final question. And it is boring.
9:31 — Pence still looks like he needs to go potty.
9:29 — Abortion stuff. Of course they disagree, but Kaine masterfully turns it into Trump’s crazy statements about Mexican rapists.
9:25 — Now they’re trying to out-Jesus each other. Yawn.
9:20 — This is getting sad. Trump hasn’t given money to his Foundation in years.
9:18 — Pence attacks Clinton Foundation. Pay for play. Welp. Unlike Trump Foundation, the Clintons didn’t benefit from their Foundation. Maybe Pence is desperate?
9:14 — Pence is struggling with his own statements about Putin now. Good lord. I hope people are actually watching this and paying attention.
9:09 — No, now I’ve identified that Pence smug chuckle of disagreement when Kaine points out Trump’s insane positions. It’s when you are telling a parent what a spoiled snot their kid is and they just kinda laugh like, oh, that Bubba is such a cute kid, why are these idiots so upset that he’s pulling the wings off of flies? Huh huh huh.
9:07 — Pence is nodding like that guy who absorbs an insult at the bar but is thinking how is gonna get you back. Someday.
9:03 — Boom! Kaine brings NY Times tax story out of nowhere to bang Pence on the head with it.
9:00 — Teabaggers like Pence want “safe zones,” which are mythical, instead of getting vulnerable people the hell out of Syria. What a crock.
8:59 — Apparently Pence don’t like Putin like Pence’s daddy likes Putin.
8:57 — blah blah emails.
8:56 — Shaking your head and giggling under your breath is not a good debate tactic either, Governor.
8:53 — Wow. Just wow. Kaine is destroying Pence and citing an appellate decision yesterday holding that you can’t discriminate against refugees based on national origin or religion, which are Trump/Pence’s favorite criteria for their “extreme vetting” of refugees.
8:48 — Pence does not answer questions. He cannot defend Trump’s insanity. All he can do is ask Kaine if that last point he made was well-rehearsed and then he goes on to talk about something else. As a trial lawyer that infuriates me. Answer the damned question, Pence. How do you defend Trump’s insane ideas on disbanding NATO and supporting dictators like Putin and we need more countries with nukes? How do you do that? Answer: Hillary bad and Obama bad.
8:46 — Kaine is deadly. He asked how Pence could defend Trump’s saying Mexican-American judge was unqualified to hear his case. Pence just shook his head. Shaking your head is not a good debate tactic, dude.
8:42 — Hey Pence, answer the question. How do you defend deporting millions of undocumented immigrants? Hmm?
8:41 — Love Kaine. He’s the kind of killer who you would buy a drink for right before he pulled the trigger.
8:38 — Immigration now. Oh lord. Immigration is driving wages down, Pence says. Criminal aliens are a big problem. What bullshit. Now Pence says all these “criminal aliens” need to be gone. Which ones are that?
8:35 — criminal justice reform my ass. Trump wants to turn black neighborhoods into a police state with stop and frisk. Ridiculous claims by Pence as to how sympathetic these guys are to black men gunned down because they were driving while black.
8:33 — Pence floundering on police violence against black suspects. He is bouncing from example to idea to stupidity and back again. I can’t even follow WTF he’s saying.
8:27 — Oh lord. Pence just pulled out “there they go again.” Dude you are so not Ronald Reagan, and defending your voting record on wanting to privatize social security is impossible.
8:25 — Commenter Wayne Farris points out red candidate has blue tie and blue candidate has red tie. Weird.
8:23 — Pence floundering on Trump tax issue. Kaine is with his sweet-natured raised eyebrow is a deadly hatchet man. Good job.
8:22 — Pence says lower taxes will help economy and raise tax income. Didn’t work for Reagan. Never has worked. When will the wingnuts stop the supply-side insanity?
8:20 — Kaine giving serious tax policy arguments. Yes it’s boring but yes it’s important. Trump wants to lower taxes on himself. Did someone say taxes on Trump? Hmmm?
8:18 — Pence says Obama and Hillary want a “war on coal.” Kind of like “war on poop” or “war on dirt.” Pencey, coal is causing global warming. Oh wait, that doesn’t exist according to you, right?
8:15 — Tie on who’s to blame for foreign policy failures because both just talked over the other. Sounded like an argument between your crazy gun-toting uncle and your hipster cousin over Thanksgiving dinner.
8:12 — Pence blaming Hillary for middle east strife. Um. GW Bush, anyone? And Pence is whining about how Democrats are insulting poor misunderstood Trump. Boo hoo.
8:11 — Kaine fulfilling traditional VP role as attack dog. Pence looks like he needs to go potty.
8:02 — What are we waiting for? Clearly the CNN talking heads have run out of things to say.
8:00 — CNN panel consensus is that this debate it irrelevant. Then why the hell are we watching it?
7:44 — Debate commission officials speaking. Watching is kinda like watching paint dry.
7:22 — Settled on CNN as the least painful channel on which to watch this debate. Even this is coverage that looks like they’re covering the baseball play-offs instead of a debate. There is so much print and so many screens it’s apparently aimed at the ADD crowd.