Thanks to the disheartening elevation of former Senator Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions to U.S. Attorney General, Alabamians head to the polls beginning in August to select his replacement. There are nineteen candidates, 11 Republican and 8 Democrat, but only three Republicans have a realistic chance of winning: incumbent Senator Luther Strange, who was appointed to the post by disgraced former Governor Robert Bentley; Representative Mo Brooks (R. Huntsville), whose public utterances brand him as a heartless dumbass; and former Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore, who has been removed from that office twice for his refusal to follow law that conflicted with his evangelical religious beliefs.
We should stop and point out that Blue Southerner strongly supports the candidacy of former U.S. Attorney Doug Jones, who would make an outstanding Senator. As a Democrat running for statewide office in Alabama, however, poor Doug has about as much chance of winning as my new puppy. We all know the next Senator from Alabama is going to be a Republican.
Since Del Marsh, the President pro tempore of the Alabama Senate, surprisingly decided not to run, as a practical matter the real race is among Strange, Brooks, and Moore.
All three suck, but for different reasons.
Mo Brooks is so right-wing that he is prone to accidentally articulating what right-wingers all really think, but have enough sense not to say out loud, in public, where the press can quote it. In a 2011 interview with WHNT-TV, when asked about illegal immigrants in the Unites States, Brooks said “As your congressman on the House floor, I will do anything short of shooting them. Anything that is lawful, it needs to be done because illegal aliens need to quit taking jobs from American citizens.” Sitting congresscritters normally don’t mention shooting human beings that don’t have proper documentation. They might think about it, but they don’t say it, because they are not idiots. As mentioned, Brooks is A Idiot and so we should not be surprised when manure like this sharts out of his mouth-hole.
In 2014, Brooks went on The Laura Ingraham Show. Ingraham played a clip of journalist Ron Fournier warning that the Republican Party could not survive as the “party of white people.” Brooks, who as mentioned tends to blurt shit out that right-wingers with IQs in the triple digits keep bottled up inside, responded: “Well, this is a part of the war on whites that’s being launched by the Democratic Party… And the way in which they’re launching this war is by claiming that whites hate everybody else. It’s part of the strategy that Barack Obama implemented in 2008, continued in 2012, where he divides us all on race, on sex, creed, envy, class warfare, all those kinds of things.”
Now, Brooks is not a redneck sheriff from Nowhere, Arizona. He is an actual sitting member of the United States Congress. And he’s shrieking “war on whites” even before the 2016 election of Donald Trump emboldened white nationalists.
Just this year, Brooks made national headlines when, in a CNN interview concerning the GOP’s ongoing ineptitude in repealing and replacing Obamacare, he had this to say about the latest heartless proposal to allow insurance companies to charge much higher premiums to those with pre-existing conditions: “It will allow insurance companies to require people who have higher health care costs to contribute more to the insurance pool that helps offset all these costs, thereby reducing the cost to those people who lead good lives, they’re healthy, they’ve done the things to keep their bodies healthy. And right now, those are the people who have done things the right way that are seeing their costs skyrocketing.”
Yes, you read that right. People with pre-existing conditions deserve to be charged more for insurance, because they haven’t “lead good lives.” I guess my friend who was born with spinal muscular atrophy didn’t “lead a good life” before he inherited the gene that keeps him in a wheelchair. Brooks also thinks paraplegics paralyzed by a drunk driver failed to “lead good lives.” And it is clearly the failure to lead a “good life” that leads to childhood leukemia.
What a complete idiot. His wife shouldn’t let him drive.
Roy Moore, on the other hand, doesn’t necessarily want to screw poor people out of healthcare to the point that they die from lack of access to basic medicine. No, Moore just wants to impose his brand of evangelical hillbilly Christianity on the whole country by using the power of the state. In 2004, the Alabama Court of the Judiciary removed him from office because he refused to obey a federal court order to remove a boulder-size Ten Commandments monument from the Alabama Supreme Court premises, a religious chunk of rock that Moore had put there in his role of Chief Justice. He was reelected Chief Justice in 2012. In 2016 he was suspended without pay for the remainder of his term for ordering Alabama’s probate judges (most of whom aren’t even lawyers) to ignore the U.S. Supreme Court’s decision in Obergefell striking down state laws against same-sex marriage.
Moore thinks that part of the First Amendment banning governmental “establishment” of religion does not apply to him. He has a long history of ignoring the actual law when it conflicts with his brand of hick religion. And we may put him in charge of making laws?
And then we have Luther Strange, who is being heavily supported as an “incumbent” by the national GOP. Compared to Brooks’s Tea Party screw the poors attitude and Moore’s views on “my Bible trumps the law,” many see him as the more moderate, more intelligent, more genteel of the trio vying for the vacant Alabama Senate seat.
There’s just one little teensy weensy problem with Big Luther.
He is an “incumbent” senator because he solicited and received an appointment to replace former Senator Sessions from Alabama’s former Boob Grabber in Chief, Robert Bentley. He received this monumental political gift when, as the state’s Attorney General, he was in charge of the criminal investigation into Bentley’s use of state resources to further and hide his disgusting affair with former advisor Rebekah Caldwell Mason. It was an obvious (and ineffectual) attempt by the former governor to derail the investigation that ultimately lead to his resignation in the face of near-certain impeachment by a legislature that, having looked the other way for months, was finally goaded into action by Bentley’s stupidly cynical decision to appoint Strange to the vacant Senate seat.
Bentley’s enormous political error in elevating the man prosecuting him out of his prosecutorial role may correctly be compared to Donald Trump’s equally jaw-dropping decision to fire James Comey, the FBI Director in charge of investigating the Trump campaign’s alleged ties to and collusion with the Russians who meddled in the 2016 presidential election.
The difference is that Comey, unlike Strange, did not willingly participate in what looks a whole lot like obstruction of justice.
So who will it be, Alabama? Behind Door Number One, we have a right-winger so dumb he can’t even keep his heartless right-wing thoughts to himself. Behind Door Number Two, we have a religious nut who thinks the United States should be governed according to his fringe religious beliefs. And behind Door Number Three, there is a politician so lacking in scruples that he accepted a senatorial appointment from a governor motivated by nothing except saving his own sorry ass from criminal charges.
Who will it be?
How about Doug Jones, who successfully prosecuted the racists who bombed a black Birmingham church in 1963? He is an able lawyer, a moderate Democrat, and a good man.
Alabama, let’s elect him instead of these three assholes.
What do you say?